Four things.

I don't know what I want from life.

Well I do.

Just not right now. 

I know what I want from say when I'm 30 onwards. From now until then I have no idea. I'm led to believe in this time I'm supposed to do four things.

Step 1. Find the thing I love doing most.

Step 2. Find a way to get paid to do it.

Step 3. Find the woman of my dreams

Step 4. Marry the dreamy woman.

The problem is - were given all these expectations and things were 'supposed' to do - but not actually told exactly when or anything about them. 

The perfect job? Well that's up to you to decide.

The dreamy woman? Well she's the woman of your dreams, not everyone else's. Otherwise we'd all be chasing the same woman. 

As new generations are born, the 'rules' change. Not slightly and never really subtly either. Step back two generations to an 18 year old girl and she'd probably be prepping herself for marriage. Look at an 18 year old girl now, well marriage isn't on the cards for anytime soon. I'm not saying that it's a bad thing, just that it's a thing. 

The changing of 'rules' between generations, actually works out quite well for us. The window of opportunity for each individual life element only expands. If you're not married by the time you're 21 not only is it not a big deal anymore it's a normal thing not to be. If you are married at 21 well congratulations and good on you. 

Despite the fact it is a good thing and me agreeing on that, it doesn't change the fact of how daunting it is. I'm constantly worried about making the wrong choice in life because great opportunities don't always come around that often and when they do you better damn sure you make good use of it and that means making the right decision. 

I know people say that when you meet 'the one' you just know and everything's all rainbows, fairy bread and eternal happiness. But I unfortunately must ask the question of what if I'm wrong? What if of the 6 billion people on the planet the one person I pick to be my one and only is the wrong one. Of 6 billion people, I call the odds at getting it wrong. 

I'm sure you instantly think that's a morbid, glass half empty way of looking at things. But I can't help but wonder about the mistakes I may have made and could possibly make. You can't say that I won't. But who am I to say that I will. I hope that when she comes along that I do just know and everything is all rainbows, fairy bread and eternal happiness. But in the meantime what am I supposed to do? Society says date, which is like a trial marriage. If you can do it for so long and everything is right then you continue. How am I supposed to know then if I do and it flows and seems alright, that it actually is? Is this another case where you just know? 

My point is this. How do I overcome the fear of making the wrong decisions in life that are making me too scared to even attempt to make the right decisions. 

Not just a question only applicable to this situation but to many. 

People often refer to a job as 'what you want to do in life'.

I currently am yet to find what I want to do in life. So in the meantime ill do what works, do what pays and do what keeps me interested. I don't find myself living to work at all. I find myself working to live. Work is merely a tool that allows me to live the life I really want to on weekends. I may never find exactly what I 'want to do in life' but I'm okay with that. I might find lots of little things that I like doing over my lifetime. If you live to work, that's great for you and I'm really glad you've found something so fantastic that when you wake up in the morning you just can't wait for the day to start. But for the rest of us who do the things that we need to do, or do what is available because nothing much interests us or just do a job because no matter how shit it is you take home a butt load of cash and some awesome holidays to spend that cash - we'll just do that. And that's okay. Because at the end of the day, if you're happy with what you're doing and what your life looks like standing in your shoes, then that's all that matters. It's your life, your call. 

Easy.

Life is easier than you'd think; all that is necessary is to accept the impossible, do without the indispensable, and bear the intolerable.

Impossible.
The word, is only defined by your personal expectations of your own capabilities.  If you define your own powers and your own strength as weak, everything seems impossible. Every bridge seems burned, every obstacle too big, all your baggage, too heavy. None of that is right though, because it's all about your definition. If you define something as impossible, it is. You will never be able to overcome it, work around it, get by it, get over it, live with it. You've defined it as a limit. Something that can stop you from continuing. If you've defined it as impossible and it stops you.
Do you understand what that means?
You're holding yourself back. You're creating the impossible. You have created your own limit. You have created an impossibility. Your life is impeded by your own self-doubt and self-value.

What the heck man! Why are you stopping yourself? When you look at something and tell yourself it can't be done, it won't be done, you've just stopped yourself from possibly doing something incredible, something amazing, something LIFE CHANGING! Let's say you want to give up everything where you live and move overseas. Start fresh, start new, see the world. Do it. Sure, it's a huge task that takes a lot of planning, time and money. But you know what? IF you wanna do it? You freaking do it. It's not impossible, everything is possible. It only becomes impossible when you say it does.


Indispensable.
Indispensable is something that is absolutely necessary or essential. Again, there is nothing in your life that fits this category. There is nothing that you absolutely cannot live with out. You don't need a house. You don't need a car. You don't need to go to europe. You don't need a chihuahua. You don't need make up. You don't need clothes. You need nothing. You decide what your life contains and once you decide that, you can decide what you define as an indispensable thing. The things you should be assigning to that category are things that if you lost, you would want to die. Life would seem absolutely worth not living without those things. If your car gets stolen, not that big of a deal. You can buy a new car. It shouldn't be things you can buy or material possessions. The truly indispensable things. You know what they are. If you don't, shit you need to sort your priorities. If you've had those things taken from you, whether it's for good or only a short time, god I hope you appreciate them. Cling to them, nurture them, be nice to them, forgive them, love them. If you're lucky enough to have never felt the hurt of losing something or everything you class as indispensable then take it from me and the rest of us when I say it hurts. You never feel more close to death than when you have nothing to live for.


Intolerable.
We all know that one person who shits us so much that one day you think you might just snap and drive the nearest object through their forehead. Intolerable right? Wrong. Whether someones a dickhead, an asshole, rude, pretentious, moronic, a royal pain in your ass or maybe all of the above they're still not intolerable. Unfortunately for you, there's about seven billion people on this planet. So your opinion of someone, your attitude towards them is a grain of sand on the longest beach in the universe. So that means the it's up to you to change your attitude and change isn't as hard or as scary as people make it out to be. You just have to be prepared for it all the time. Realize that you are constantly changing and you are never the same person for two seconds. As your mind ticks over and you consider the questions of life, questions of the day, considering different options, different decisions, you are changing. You are growing. Take something intolerable and consider every element of it. You will find one, if not several, great qualities. If it's a person you need to remember all of the shit baggage you have stored away that you never ever ever want to let out for everyone. How do you know they don't have the same? Worse? You don't. Everyone you meet, before you judge them consider your own baggage, all of your shit, all of your secrets, all of your crap experiences that created a bad side of you that you don't like and put that into them. Make them you. They have all your shit. Your life is theirs. When you meet them, when you greet them, when you hate them, when you try to avoid them consider who you've now made them. You know all of their baggage, all their ins and outs, what makes them exactly who they are. You wouldn't judge so harshly now would you? You'd tolerate them, hell you'd probably feel for them. No longer intolerable. You are as much intolerable to other people as they are to you, remember that.